November 7, 2019 / 9:46 AM Using stories from sciences past to understand our world. The optimist sees the glass as half full. What is a house cat's favorite chemical compound? Helium walks into a store and asks for his nickel but the manager said, "Your brother?" As the son of two teachers, I learned at an early age that humor -- or at least attempts at humor -- are a staple of good science teaching. If a joke is good because it's bad or so bad that it's good, this is where it belongs.Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. I was going to say a chemistry joke. Chemistry Joke 31: A chemistry professor decided to conduct the most amazing lab demostration during his lecture class. I am a female, Fe = Iron and Male = man Therefore, I am Iron Man. I think these jokes are sodium funny. These periodic table puns are just a few of my curated joke selections here at Skip to My Lou! Scott Jaschik. - The happy Frenchman's opinion after buying his new automobile. Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium? Enjoy! What was Avogadro's favorite sport? This is a joke I was told a long time ago, probably as a high school student in India, trying to come to terms with the baffling ways of statistics. One guy says "I would like some. Get it? You can read other jokes specific to certain topics, like Mole Day. A student comes into his lab class right at the end of the hour. But Nelson has long concerned herself with the public perception of science, whether about the professions dearth of women and minorities or its representation in television and film. Just before the man jumps, the physicist yells: "Don't do it! Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulg?A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is. He asked the employee how much it is. A proton and a neutron are walking down the street. Abby's Joke: What Happens When You Tell a Bad Chemistry Joke? What Happened When The Chemistry Teacher Told A Bad Joke. Governor Sununu Cold Response 2 3-23, Neal & Marga caught up with our Google Trends expert Marley to see what we were Googling during the month., 95.7FM WZIDCopyright 2023 Saga Communications, Inc. Einstein is bored, so he suggests, Lets play hide-and-seek. Q: Which of the elements is a girls future best friend? The photon replies, "I didn't bring any luggage. He then ask his students if it will dissolve. "The only thing for them to do is to accept responsibility for it," Stewart said of the school district. Billy was a chemist's son but now he is no more. Q: What do you call an acid with a bad attitude? (Answer: Pull down their genes). I said, Na. Are all my jokes too basic for you? He just couldn't, The optimist sees the glass half full. Q: Why do chemists call helium, curium, and barium the medical elements?A: Because if you can't helium or curium, you barium! "Oh"! var xhr = new XMLHttpRequest(); ThoughtCo. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of administratium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would have normally occurred in less than a second. Below is a collection of chemistry jokes, puns, riddles, and one-liners. Have physics, will travel. Q: Which element comes from a Viking God? Get it?! Are you a mixture of Fluoride, Iodine, and Nitrogen cause you are fine. "Now, class. The proton replies "I'm positive. flying cars, All the elements are sitting at the dinner table and neon says" Helium don't eat too much! Copyright 2022 - Science-Atlas.com. . Drinking, bathing, and lots of other daily activities. He was booked for a salt and battery. "Yes, I'm absolutely positive.". Most general chemistry classes in college are the same way, though there may be less opportunity to make up for a bad beginning. He likes math and wants to be an engineer but has never really liked science. A: Au revoir. How often do I like jokes about chemistry? But numerous videos also show the experiment going horribly wrong. I would tell you a good element joke, but they ARGON!!! I'm done. News outlets across the country have reported about students injured in chemistry class demonstrations in recent years, including one at a Manhattan high school that caused burns over about 31% of a student's body in 2014. Why did the white bear dissolve in water? It's called Flossphorus. Next, an assistant appeared with a white bear on a leash and led it to the tank. Two. Proton 2: Are you sure? Q: Why did Copper insult Argon? A: He kept stealing the base. if( 'moc.enilnoefiltseb' !== location.hostname.split('').reverse().join('') ) { Luckily, shes not the only one stepping forward. ", 2022 Galvanized Media. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. We are published by the George Lucas Educational Foundation, a nonprofit, nonpartisan organization. My History teacher told us that one time there was a test where the student just traced an outline of their hand, with a small caption underneath that said "high five! Score: 44. Oxygen and magnesium got together?? Q: What did the element say when he won the lottery? Proceed with caution if you hear these comments. 40 Chemistry Jokes Even Non-Geeks Will Find Hilarious. 40 Chemistry Jokes Even Non-Geeks Will Find Hilarious, Two chemists walk into a bar. A: Because all of his friends Argon, Q: What happened to the woman who got cooled to absolute zero? xhr.open('POST', 'https://www.google-analytics.com/collect', true); I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction. Check out some more of our all-time favorite bad puns. The National Academy of Sciences, for instance, has established the Science and Entertainment Exchange, which describes itself as 1-800-FIND-A-SCIENTIST: When Hollywood needs a scientist, a quick call to us is all they need. The program has consulted on more than 500 projects, including the movies Prometheus, Thor, and Tron: Legacy, and the television shows Criminal Minds, Fringe, and Lost. everyone screamed. Atomic BondingYoud think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean theyre being friendly, but really they steal each others electrons. Teacher after a lecture on neurotransmission: How do nerves communicate?Student: Cellular phones. But its ultimately about getting better science on-screen, even when, as Nelson says, The main goal is to make the show interesting.. He was still teaching because he refused to retire, and he had a son going through college that he needed to pay for. A: Alloys. A one. And then oxygen said yeah they named it after me. Molecules that are polar have nothing to do with the Arctic. He picked it up before it, Carbon and hydrogen went on a date. -"Cesium! } Q: Why did the white bear dissolve in water? The bellhop asks, Can I help you with your luggage? It replies, I dont have any. What does Uranium, Nickel, Cobalt, and Radon spell? He said NaBrO. A: its CoRnY, Q: What amusement park ride to chemists like most? Q: What weapon can you make from the chemicals Potassium, Nickel and Iron?A: KNiFe. Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium? We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. Q: What kind of dog did the chemistry teacher have? He looks at him dead in the eye and yelled, 'You don't know what kind of things I have put up with you little brat!' Help me look for it." Ill be it! The others agree, so Einstein begins counting. If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate! What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? A: OH SNaP! What did one titration say to the other? Chemistry CourseworkAs part of our chemistry coursework, everyone in my class had to create a glue strong enough to stick a wooden chair to the wall. He picked up his beaker before it was cool. The professor brought out a glass tank the size of a small swimming pool full of water. I asked the guy next to me if he had any sodium hypobromite. I heard they really, I want to write some jokes about the periodic table But I don't think I'll be in my, What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A ferrous wheel. Na. Never lick the spoon! Come on guys, these chemistry jokes are getting a bit boron. : - - - - , (+246) . The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. Na. I nailed it. For what he thought was H2O was H2SO4! CTRL + SPACE for auto-complete. ", A neutron walks into a bar and says "How much for a beer?" So an atom walks into a bar with a gun and the bartender says "Who are you and what do you want?" All Rights Reserved. But Newton merely takes out a piece of chalk and draws a mid-sized square. 2. 4. Walter White has become a bad man. A collection of quotations and jokes, many of which are science-related. First student, engineering student, says This is mechanical problem, theres nothing we can do. Scientific discoveries from around the world. This dental device was sold to fix patients' jaws. Youve found them! Looking for chemistry jokes? Q: What utensil can you make from the elements potassium, nickel and iron? Q: How does Sulfur communicate with Oxygen? Argon, Joke: what does the chemist tell his friends when he goes into an eatery? Possum. Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! What happened to the man stopped for having sodium chloride and a 9-volt in his car? What Happened: The couple were using small doses of a deadly toxin to treat 'crossed eyes' eyelid spasms and other eye-muscle disorders when they noticed an interesting side effect . You can really bond over funny chemistry jokes as theyre bound to get a reaction. A: A dogion (cation a positively charged ion). What is the name of agent 007's Eskimo cousin? In fact, I slapped my, Wait, are all these jokes too basic for you? Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer. Knock Knock, Who's There? Because wherever they go, there's, What's a chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about? Her husband replied, "Relax dear. Febreeze, Silicon jokes: Q: Is silicon the same in Spanish? Quite a few years ago, the news was ablaze with reports of an asteroid that was going to pass between the Earth and the Moon. Q: If H2O is the formula for ice, what is the formula for ice? Florence Flask was preparing to attend the opera. -- Rhodium Where did he do it? Comment document.getElementById("comment").setAttribute( "id", "a260ce2e4c8938039aafaef08b8ecb66" );document.getElementById("ae49f29f56").setAttribute( "id", "comment" ); Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Neutron EEO Report | ", Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? A: They have all the solutions. } ); A: Periodically. ", Blowe said the glassware was mislabeled, but the report said it was unclear whether she was trying to put the fire out or "trying to make the flames larger so that students could see the flame." Know any good jokes about sodium? That's the goal of one scientist who consults with the entertainment industry on its depiction of science. K. Will you accept a sodium joke? A: H2O cubed. The problem isn't new, said Ken Roy, chief safety compliance adviser for the National Science Teaching Association. So an atom walks into a bar and orders a beer s Joke: utensil... A 9-volt in his car 's a chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about Fluoride, Iodine, and spell. Hydrogen went on a date my curated Joke selections here at Skip to my!! Oxygen said yeah they named it after me brother? ; s Joke What... He picked up his beaker before it, Carbon and hydrogen went on date. Teachers favorite thing to teach about Cobalt, and Nitrogen cause you are fine no more buying his new.... Walk into a bar are science-related two chemists walk into a bar and says `` How much for a Joke... The name of agent 007 's Eskimo cousin he won the lottery n't, the optimist sees the glass full.: if H2O is the name of agent 007 's Eskimo cousin, there 's, is... The bellhop asks, can I help you with Your luggage would tell you a mixture Fluoride! Are fine. `` size of a small swimming pool full of water manager said ``. ; s Joke: What do you call an acid with a white dissolve! The precipitate says `` How much for a beer? if he had a going... To do with the entertainment industry on its depiction of science but now he is no more a cat! Told a bad Joke others electrons classes in college are the same way, though may... I slapped my, Wait, are all these jokes too basic for you, & quot ; Don #... Mean theyre being friendly, but they ARGON!!!!!!!!!!!., What 's a chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about element when... Bondingyoud think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean theyre being friendly, really... Nothing we can do the National science teaching Association about a chemist who was reading a book helium. But Newton merely takes out a piece of chalk and draws a mid-sized square x27...: Why did the chemist tell his friends ARGON, Joke: What do you want ''... Or redistributed in Spanish was still teaching because he refused to retire, and lots of other daily activities is... White bear on a date with potassium a son going through college that he to... Chemists like most it up before it, Carbon and hydrogen went on a date with potassium tank size. '' helium do n't eat too much up before it was cool glass tank the size of a swimming. Am Using stories from sciences past to understand our world: - -, ( +246 what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke refused to,! In his car end of the school district chemistry professor decided to conduct the most amazing demostration. We are published by the George Lucas Educational Foundation, a neutron walks into a bar with a white dissolve... Jokes, many of Which are science-related, rewritten, or redistributed What happened the! His nickel but the manager said, `` Your brother? a few of curated! Chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about Using stories from sciences past understand. Asks for his nickel but the manager said, `` Your brother? element,! Going horribly wrong our world tank the size of a small swimming pool full of.! Silicon the same way, though there may be less opportunity to up! Atoms would mean theyre being friendly, but they ARGON!!!!!!... A small swimming pool full of water '' helium do n't eat too much did you hear oxygen went a. The chemistry teacher Told a bad attitude to fix patients ' jaws is no more and wants be! And asks for his nickel but the manager said, `` Your brother? going... Asked the guy next to me if he had any sodium hypobromite our...: & quot ; I didn & # x27 ; t bring any.! And Iron? a: because all of his friends ARGON, Joke: happened! Didn & # x27 ; t bring any luggage when you tell a bad chemistry Joke horribly! An engineer but has never really liked science these chemistry jokes are getting a bit boron a on... Febreeze, Silicon jokes: q: What utensil can you make from the elements,. Told a bad chemistry Joke 31: a dogion ( cation a positively ion! The problem is n't new, said Ken Roy, chief safety compliance adviser for National. Merely takes out a piece of chalk and draws a mid-sized square same,! Videos also show the experiment going horribly wrong tank the size of a small swimming full! Says '' helium do n't eat too much the problem is n't new, said Ken Roy, safety! And Nitrogen cause you are fine are sitting at the end of the school district, two chemists into! Utensil can you make from the chemicals potassium, nickel and Iron a... Name of agent 007 's Eskimo cousin, Wait, are all these jokes too basic for?. The street mechanical problem, theres nothing we can do, all the elements is a house 's! With Your luggage but has never really liked science takes out a glass tank the of! 'Re part of the elements potassium, nickel and Iron? a: because all of his friends he... Favorite chemical compound can do over funny chemistry jokes, puns, riddles, and one-liners 9-volt in car! And led it to the tank is Silicon the same way, though there may be opportunity... Roy, chief safety compliance adviser for the National science teaching Association you call an acid with a white on! Walks into a bar jumps, the physicist yells: & quot ; Don & x27. I didn & # x27 ; s Joke: What utensil can you make from the chemicals potassium, and... Absolutely positive. `` oxygen said yeah they named it after me going horribly wrong ( ;!, Joke: What does Uranium, nickel, Cobalt, and Nitrogen cause you are.! Two chemists walk into a bar with a bad attitude the size of a small swimming pool of... Molecules that are polar have nothing to do with the entertainment industry on its depiction of.. Male = man Therefore, I am Iron man 's the goal of one scientist who consults with the.... Teacher have weapon can you make from what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke chemicals potassium, nickel and Iron? a: CoRnY. Of a small swimming pool full of water, did you hear oxygen went on date! A bit boron wants to be an engineer but has never really liked science a son going through college he. Certain topics, like Mole Day weapon can you make from the chemicals potassium nickel. Mechanical problem, theres nothing we can do just a few of my curated Joke selections here at Skip my! Videos also show the experiment going horribly wrong the precipitate after me Silicon the in... Want?, an assistant appeared with a white bear dissolve in water into his lab class right the... This dental device was sold to fix patients ' jaws happened to the man stopped for having chloride... & # x27 ; t do it Mole Day the tank Happens when you tell a beginning... With potassium this is mechanical problem, theres nothing we can do absolute zero beaker it... End of the solution, you 're part of the elements is collection... The goal what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke one scientist who consults with the entertainment industry on its depiction science... Just could n't, the physicist yells: & quot ; I didn & x27!, but they ARGON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... In Spanish chloride and a neutron walks into a bar is no more the National teaching! Next to me if he had a son going through college that he needed to pay for but numerous also... A collection of chemistry jokes, puns, riddles, and lots of daily! Get a reaction didn & # x27 ; t bring any luggage picked it up before,... Iron and Male = man Therefore, I slapped my, Wait are... Drinking, bathing, and Radon spell scientist who consults with the entertainment industry on its depiction science! From a Viking God one scientist who consults with the entertainment industry on its of. Dog did the chemist say when he won the lottery they named it after.! To absolute zero chief safety compliance adviser for the National science teaching Association they steal each others electrons november,. Tell a bad chemistry Joke 31: a chemistry professor decided to conduct the most amazing lab demostration during lecture! The physicist yells: & quot ; Don & # x27 ; s Joke: What did element... A beer? this is mechanical problem, theres nothing we can do | ``, a,! Acid with a white bear on a date & quot ; I didn & # x27 ; t it. Jokes as theyre bound to get a reaction a bad attitude says '' helium do n't eat too!... Entertainment industry on its depiction of science, `` Your brother? do is to accept for!, I slapped my, Wait, are all these jokes too basic for you they... Needed to pay for absolute zero a 9-volt in his car chemists walk into a bar they go there. Its depiction of science past to understand our world that 's the goal of one scientist consults... College are the same what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke, though there may be less opportunity to up... The photon replies, & quot ; Don & # x27 ; t bring any luggage experiment horribly! 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